A roll of the dice.
Is it chance or the release
of inhibition? They say flip a coin and you’ll know
the decision you already made.
They say things happen
for a reason.
She always called at three am.
They didn’t tell you that.
They didn’t tell you that you’d wonder why
She’s crying because she’s drunk
and picked a fight with her pregnant roommate.
Because her roommate is the crazy one.
Because she needs to move out
Because you’re the only one who understands,
not that you do. But you did kiss once,
and ever since she called or just showed up
when she needed you.
Always three am.
She wakes you with a phone call from the Tri-Cities,
half a state away, so you get nervous.
Only this time she don’t need you,
but a play on what you would do
if she were with you. Every time
her heart broke she called you.
You keep the dice in your hand
because you know this is a gamble that won’t pay,
but you always wonder.
Because you know what she wants
may start in your pants but ends with a ring
that isn’t worth the payment plan.
When she called you the last time
you were driving a U-Haul
full of the things belonging
to a girl you didn’t love.
It was daytime,
but she called anyway.
Three broken engagements in a year
and she’s stuck in Los Angeles.
It’s three am she must be lonely
but she doesn’t know you anymore.
She’s back home in Pasco
and her high is fading,
so she drives to Columbia Park,
plays Russian Roulette
and loses to herself.
Now every time you roll the dice
her eyes look up at you.